This is what my pregnancy book has to say about the state that I seem to be in: "The nesting urge is likely to be at fever pitch. Many women find themselves scrubbing underneath shelves and may have to be restrained. Don't do anything that involves standing on a chair or a ladder, no matter how much you feel that dusting the curtain rail is crucial to life as we know it" (Kaz Cooke, Pregnancy and Birth, Week 38).
I'm not in week 38 yet (or else, according to Mr. D. aka Dr. CutCut, baby would be out already), but I'm in a state all right. It was kick started last Wednesday when I got on a bus to go into town to meet my friend Sonja for coffee (normally I would walk into town, but things aren't normal any more, so neither am I). The driver looked at me and said, My, that tummy sits low, I'd be a very bad midwife, so try not to have it on my bus! Not to worry, I told him, this is the natural shape of my bump, not a sign. But as soon as Sonja laid eyes on me, she exclaimed: Your tummy has dropped! and started patting it excitedly. Nooot long now, she cooed. Which sent me into a mildly panicked frenzy that involved sorting clothing by size (newborn, 0-3 months, 3-6 months, 6+ months), washing load after load, staring at wet clothes to encourage them to dry more quickly (so I could go and do yet another load), wondering whether to iron everything or just about everything, then ironing EVERYTHING including crease free materials and muslin clothes (Alex to Sonja: I'm feeling the urge to iron muslin clothes. Am I insane? Sonja to Alex: To the highest degree, so keep it to yourself!), next folding the lot neatly and putting away what fit into the ONE drawer I had emptied for the purpose. It was late Sunday by then, and I hadn't even as much as looked at the curtain rail, or started on the 3-6 months' pile (Nesting, however hysterical, seems to be slowed down considerably by the nesting individual's natural inclination towards slothdom).
At present I'm at the stage where I look at the remaining neat piles of 0-3 months on my bed, wondering whether to a) give the baby away once born due to lack of space; b) have twins to make sure every lovely tiny item gets worn at least once; c) buy more storage space in the form of either boxes or a wardrobe; d) throw away half of my own clothing (no longer fits anyway) to make more space within existing storage units. Things are being complicated, of course, by the onset of the summer SALES!!! in town, where yet more tiny and IRRESISTABLY beautiful items are waiting to be bought BY ME! And then there is, of course, the helpful sales teams going, "And you know, the good thing about GAP is that you can return everything even in a few months time as long as you keep the receipt. You could spend 100 Pounds on girl clothes and 100 on boy clothes now if you don't know what you're having, and then just return what you don't need!" And you know what? I can!! Why not buy another 2 irresistably cute blankets (we ONLY had 3 before, and, ok, 5 sleeping bags), one yellow, one pink, matching pink clothing and a pink baby girl swimsuit (6-12 months - can go in "6+ months" box and does not need drawer storage space yet - bargain!) just in case Jose's daughter is indeed a girl?!
And just to prove I'm truly pregnant and not just simply insane and looking for excuses to shop shop shop (SALES!!!), here's another snap of the tummy in its current state (I call it the shove-a-loaf-of-bread-in shape). It raises certain concerns regarding ideal birthing positions (head down) but I' told that the head is indeed down where it belongs. And until we're proven wrong on that, it looks rather endearing - even if it means that Jose by now has to help me into my socks and shoes on occasion, which he does as obligingly as he cooks me salmon-and-broccoli superfood dinners ("Eat up! It's for the baby!") as he cleans up after me ("Jooossseeee! I've spilt some juice on the floor!").
Quote Jose: "Alex stop writing and come here! Your salmon is now officially getting cold!"
